Tuesday, May 23, 2006

RZA presents: The Fallout (Parental Advisory: TMI ahead)

I came home today and the wife got home before me. The problem with my personal disconnectedness is that I often see things from above. Which sometimes has me contemplating the next move or the grand scheme when I should be in the moment. I can't say I think in chess, but maybe a little. Not good chess anyway. I think in bad chess. But somehow I knew when I got home, and I had a moment to peak, that Aili dumped her porn stash. Kept the vibrator, though. I'd ruminate on how odd I think it is that some girls like to watch porn, but whatever, I Was happy when she liked it, but I'm just as happy it's gone. I just hope she wasn't exposed to it the way I was. Finding your parents porn. The problem with kids is that you really can't hide that much from them. They're innately curious and will go through your drawers.

Part of me thinks I should never post stuff like this. But this is my hole in the ground to whisper stuff, and it may be embarassing or whatever, but I figure as long as I'm honest, then it's interesting, and meaningful. I hope I don't look at this in ten years and cringe. But maybe I'll just cringe because it was me. And if you can't be brutally honest with yourself, then what's the point.